"Busy" is the new "Fine"

I keep waiting for the time when I won't start every blog post off by saying, "so much has happened this month" but I'm kind of getting the sense that this is what life is like when you're a grown up, I guess you just learn to balance it all and soon, having a lot going on all the time seems normal. Weird. Anyway, let me fill you in on what's been happening since I last gave a life update.

Crazy Summer

There is only one word you could use to describe the summer Mitchell and I have had. The word I choose is: CRAZY! And by crazy, I mean crazy busy! It's almost as if "busy" has become the new "fine". You know when someone asks you how you are, you used to respond with, "I'm fine." Now I don't know about you, but I find myself these days answering that question with, "Busy". When did that happen? I don't know. Sometimes in my own life, I tend to equate "busy" with being satisfied or fulfilled. I constantly have to check myself and see if what I'm filling my time with is actually pleasing to God, and how He wants me to spend my time. There are things (such as watching 8 hours of One Tree Hill every day) that I don't have time for anymore, and that's okay! Life has just taken on a different twist where I have to actually manage my time and prioritize my to-do list. I guess it's all a part of growing up, right? I pray for perspective and to keep a Godly pace through life. It helps me from getting lost in the craziness!

Between taking classes, interning full-time, and traveling back home to see family, it’s all been a whirlwind! I can’t believe July is almost over! August will be here before we know it! Mitchell and I were just talking the other night about what we would do if we would’ve spent this summer apart. I honestly don’t know what I would’ve done without him. He has just been the constant support and encouragement I needed to keep going. I am so grateful that he’s been here in Nashville this summer and that we’ve been able to help each other through this crazy season! Now that summer class is over, we have our evenings to just unwind and relax, but our days are still full with our intern schedules.

Mitchell just received word that he will be interning at Capitol Christian Music Group this fall! HIS DREAM COMPANY! I’m so unbelievably proud of him. That is where he wanted to be when I first met him, and God has been SO FAITHFUL in placing him there! I honestly can't wait to see the smile on Mitchell's face every single day when he comes home because I know it'll make him so happy to be there in the fall. :)

I have a feeling that life doesn’t intend on slowing down anytime soon for us. I recently shared with my co-workers at weekly prayer that Mitchell and I are continually learning what it really means to be grown up 21-22 year olds living on our own, far far from home. Dealing with family things, car troubles, major life changes, I think God is just giving us a taste of what married life is going to be like! We’re grateful that He is teaching us. I asked them to pray that we would be good learners, and that God would teach us how to lean on each other and Him for support and guidance.

This summer has been a time when I’ve learned what it means to really lean on someone else for support while at the same time, lifting them up because they’re leaning on you! There’s no doubt this summer has just been emotionally and physically demanding on the both of us, but if we can make it through what we’ve gone through this summer, we can make it through anything! :) I don’t know if I’ve done a good enough job in thanking Mitchell for all he has done for me and for us this summer, so I’ll take the time to do it publicly now: THANK YOU MITCHELL!! I LOVE YOU!

I can’t even put into words how emotionally drained I have felt this summer. The Lord has used this season to prepare me for things ahead. As hard as some things have been to navigate and as painful as those lessons have been to learn, I’m grateful for them and I’m sure that I’m stronger than I was before experiencing them. 

I love the passage in Ecclesiastes 3 where it talks about there being a time or a season for everything. This season has really been one I can't even put into words. With the fast paced life that we've been living, along with life circumstances that have been thrown our way, I've definitely learned that there is a time for everything. In this life, we will experience all of the things Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 says. This summer season has been a time where I've cried and then I've laughed. I have been knocked down, but I've gotten back up. I've turned away, and I've embraced. I've been quiet, and I've spoken. I've hated, and I've loved.  My prayer is that this next season is one where I can laugh more and experience peace and love that my heart has missed so much this summer. I am praying that God will use this next season to heal and restore and to refresh Mitchell and I as we head into the fall semester. 

"For everything there is a season,

a time for every activity under heaven.

A time to be born and a time to die.

A time to plant and a time to harvest.

A time to kill and a time to heal.

A time to tear down and a time to build up.

A time to cry and a time to laugh.

A time to grieve and a time to dance.

A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.

A time to embrace and a time to turn away.

A time to search and a time to quit searching.

A time to keep and a time to throw away.

A time to tear and a time to mend.

A time to be quiet and a time to speak.

A time to love and a time to hate.

A time for war and a time for peace."-Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Show Hope

I started my work at Show Hope in June and I'm loving it so much! It blesses my heart every single day. I get to work with some of the most amazing and selfless people I've ever known. They treat me like I'm so much more than just an intern but a part of their family. That's what the office feels like-a family. I get to work closely with the advocates, people raising funds and awareness for Show Hope by planning events or projects using their own talents, gifts, and passions. It's so awesome to hear their stories and their reasons for wanting to advocate on Show Hope's behalf. I'm so blessed to be a part of such a wonderful organization. Check out some stories here of our past advocates who have made a HUGE difference in the lives of children waiting for forever families.

This job is blessing my heart on a daily basis. It's like I can go there and feel instantly refreshed! I know how blessed I am to work at a place like that! One thing I've been noticing even more the past few weeks is that the people here genuinely care for one another. It's a type of concern and love that goes beyond just that of typical co-workers. No, they intentionally invest in each other. It doesn't matter to them that I'm just the summer intern. They genuinely care and love me. They take the time to stop by my desk and ask how I'm doing. They'll even ask about Mitchell or ask how my parents are doing back home. I absolutely love who I get to work with every day. They are great people doing big things for the Kingdom.

God has really used my time here at Show Hope to change my heart in ways I never could have imagined. I believe He has used this experience to shape and mold me and has led me on an entirely new career path. I never would have imagined that at the beginning of my time here, God would call me to work in adoption ministry and orphan care for the rest of my life. I'm so grateful that He used my time at Show Hope to reveal this calling to me. It's like He used a little tiny piece of the picture that is my life to reveal more of what He has planned for me. I'm grateful for all that I have been able to learn here.

The original plan was for me to stay at Show Hope for the summer and then continue on with another internship of some sort. However, I have this strong sense that God is not done using me here yet, which is why I am staying on for the fall semester! I feel so honored that the Communications team is willing to keep me on and let me help out. I can't wait to see all that God has in store for me this next semester!

These are the amazing people I get to work with every day.  

New "Books I Love" Page! 

If you haven't noticed already, there is a new page on the blog! One where I list books that I've recently read and LOVED! If you're a book lover like I am, I invite you to follow that page and look for updates as I finish various books. Once I finish, I'll write up a little something and include my thoughts about the book, as well as applications I took away from it. Every month, I will feature a book that I've read for the month and ya'll can see what I've been reading! Maybe you'll even add some books to your own reading list! Check out my Books I Love page to read more about the books I've had my nose buried in recently!

At the beginning of the summer, I began reading a book by Candace Cameron Bure "Reshaping it All". Some of you, no scratch that ALL of you know her. DJ Tanner from Full House is all grown up. Married, 3 kids and an incredible testimony. She has two books already that I recommend all women read.

I could speak for hours about all of the things I'm learning from this book. It's so unlike any other "diet" book or nutrition book. You can't even really call it a diet book because it goes so far beyond just your diet and losing weight. She talks about how we live in a world where we do what we feel like, we eat what we feel like, and we drink what we feel like. We yield to our human desires at every turn. When I want ice cream, I eat ice cream. And I don't just eat one scoop, I eat at least 3 scoops. I don't eat it once a week, I eat it 3-4 times a week. You get what I'm saying? We do what we want regardless of whether or not its good for us.

She has this approach where we train ourselves to, as she says it ,"yield to the spirit" and live with self-control, which is a fruit of the spirit (Galatians 5:22) because we are called to moderation in ALL things, including food. Through her book, I've learned to train myself to eat until I'm satisfied, not full. Instead of eating "all that I can", I simply eat "all that I need". It's a fairly simple concept, but it's helped me out tremendously.

She also says that I don't have to cut out sweets completely! WHAT?! What kind of diet book will ever tell you that?! She says that if I have a sweet tooth (which, Lord knows I have one) that its fine to satisfy it in moderation. So for me, that means that instead of eating a heaping bowl of ice cream, a bite or two of ice cream will satisfy my sweet tooth, if I tell myself that it does. She says that as long as having sweets a couple times a week is part of my "plan", its okay to indulge. She talks about how its important to make a plan and stick to it, rather than relying on my impulses, because my impulses will lead me to make unhealthy choices.

What I love the most about this book is how it challenges me to let God renew the way I think about food and exercise and health. If I think of my body as gift from the Lord and as a temple of the Holy Spirit, I can see that I need to keep it healthy in order to honor God. And that if my workout is really hard one day, I remind myself that "no discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it."(Hebrews 12:11). This book has taught me to be a more disciplined human being and live by the guidance of the spirit instead of my own human desire. In return, I'm living a healthier lifestyle and feeling so much better! I feel as if my life has balance because God has changed the way I see and think because God renews my mind at the start of every day (Romans 12:2). 

Bottom line is this: a healthy, balanced, disciplined lifestyle is another way for me to Honor God with my life. This book is jammed packed with practical tips to do just that. 

CHECK IT OUT! :) 

New Major! 

I'll never forget the night Mitchell and I were sitting in Music Publishing class. Mitchell was paying attention to what Dr. Keen was speaking about, something about copyright administration. The whole time I was thinking to myself, "why am I here?" Or "I don't understand why I'm taking these classes. I don't need copyright admin to help the orphans of the world!" Even though Music Business was the very thing that brought me to Belmont, I had this overwhelming sense that its not what I needed to be spending my time studying. Feeling like it was more than just a random Emily type thought, I knew it had to have come from somewhere other than me. I remember asking God if He was trying to tell me something. After a few moments of sitting silently not feeling or hearing his voice or prompt, I began thinking those thoughts of, "this major isn't going to do anything for me anymore", that's when I had this prompt...."Emily, change it then!" As if God was telling me to quit complaining and do something about it!

Right then I began researching how that would work. Could a senior go into her last year of college with a brand new major? What was I thinking?! Was I insane?! I must be insane!! No senior in their right mind would totally turn their entire academic world upside down this close to graduating. There was no way this was going to work. Right? Wrong! God was already working this out for me and I can say now that I am on my way to graduating with a Communications Degree and Music Business minor. God used my time at Show Hope to show me that I can shine as a part of a communications team. Although there are times I'm a little freaked out about the fact that I'm changing my major with only one year left, I was told by a Communications professor that I will still graduate in time and that it is in fact very doable! God is calming all of my fears, and has comebacks for every argument I come up with. It's almost like I have no reason NOT to follow this anymore. I ran out of excuses not to. Plus, I still have my Music Business minor that I can pull out of my back pocket if I ever need to down the line. At the very least, I'll still be able to understand the music business lingo Mitchell will constantly talk in. ;) A Communications degree leaves so many opportunities open for me, and I know it was a step of obedience I was called to take. 

Singing Success

Since moving to Nashville, it's sad to think about how little singing I have been doing. I can't quite explain why. Maybe it's because I didn't have a place where I was connected to sing. Maybe it was because I was extremely intimidated by all the talent around me and felt inferior. Maybe it was a little bit of both. Whatever the reason for it, I haven't been doing nearly as much singing as I used to. For awhile, I told myself I didn't miss it. I was able to go on without it. For some reason though, this summer I've started to really miss it more than ever. I felt guilty that I had gone so long without using a gift God gave me. I had let the fear of not being as good as those around me silence me completely. At the beginning of the summer, I started to realize that it was a waste of a God-given gift. Was I going to keep on waisting it? NO way! So....I decided to sing again. I picked up my guitar for the first time in 10 long months and starting playing. I don't even remember the song I played, I guess the song itself doesn't really matter, just the fact that I was playing and singing again was all that mattered at that time. It felt SO good to be back doing something I had once loved so much. I can't believe I had made it so long without it.

Mitchell's mom had told me once about her desire to learn how to sing a few years ago. She had used a program called Singing Success to teach her techniques to singing well. Since it had been almost a year since I had taken my singing and my music seriously, I started to consider trying a program like this to get my voice back in shape to where it used to be. Thankfully, Mitchell had the entire program on his computer and was able to share it with me so I have 12 CD's full of singing exercises to help me find my voice again. At first, I was intimidated to try it. After all, I knew that I had a voice that was able to stay on pitch, but it wasn't anything extraordinary. I can't help but feel as if this program will help me uncover the extraordinary in my voice. I can't wait to see where it takes me!

My goal for all of this is to find a place where I am able to lead worship again. That is my favorite place to sing, and that is how I believe God wants me to use my voice. I was explaining to Mitchell's mom the other day why exactly it is that I love singing and leading worship. For me, my personal worship experience becomes much deeper and much more intimate with God when I am on that side of worship. When I can be up leading others to encounter God, I feel like I'm getting the most out of my worship experience. It's also a way for me to use a God-given gift for His glory. Using what He originally gave me as a way to give something back to Him. My plan is to do this singing program and work with Mitchell to get my voice where it needs to be to pass an audition. Then from there, I'll keep working and take lessons if I need to maintain and keep improving. Hopefully sometime in the next year I'll be back on stage leading worship again. For now, I'm just so happy to be singing again!! I know this makes my mom extremely happy too, since she was the one I would always lead worship alongside!

Online Prayer Journal

There is another new page on my blog! Head on over to my online prayer journal if you want to see what I’ve been praying for this month! Have your own prayer requests? Submit them on my home page contact form. :) 

July: Fear and Discipline

I'm praying for God to release me from the bondage of living in fear that something bad is going to happen. What's the use in worrying about it? Jesus said, "you will have trouble in this world. But take heart, I have overcome the world!" I'm also praying for a deeper sense of discipline with my daily devotional habits as well as my healthy eating and exercise regime.

Join me in praying for Garrick! Show Hope's monthly Prayer Focus for July!

Micayla and Jared Johnson

Awwww I love weddings. Anyone who knows me well knows that. At the end of June, Mitchell and I traveled home for my cousin Micayla's wedding. I can't even begin to tell you how GOOD it was to be home and with family. Mitchell hadn't met the Todd Sipe family yet so it was great that he was finally able to spend some time with them. Micayla and Jared had a BEAUTIFUL wedding, and yes, it did make me all the more excited to be planning my own! And yes, I did get some great ideas that I may steal borrow from Cayla. ;) It was great to see her and Jared finally tie the knot, although I feel as if Jared as been a part of the family for years. I guess it's just "official" now. I'm so glad we were able to make it home for a great family gathering! :) 

Madisen, Annie, me, and Katie.

The best family in the world right here!

The Sipe Family is growing so big!! 

Katy Perry

After a weekend at home for Micayla and Jared's wedding, Mitchell bought us tickets to go see Katy Perry in concert for her Prismatic World Tour. He was looking at tickets all week and finally just decided that it was one of those once in a lifetime experiences (although I'm pretty sure we're going back to see all of Katy Perry's concert tours ever now). All I can say is "WOW". Best concert ever....maybe. I'm still partial to all of T.Swift's shows but it was DANG GOOD! I told Mitchell that I had no idea how much I liked Katy Perry until she came rising up out of the stage and you just couldn't help but scream like a little fan girl! Her show was entertaining, yet her acoustic set was personal and raw. Through the whole thing, she just portrayed herself as this genuine and real person who you could see yourself having a normal conversation with and actually having things in common. I was NOT expecting that from Katy Perry at all, so I was pleasantly surprised when I was able to walk away from that concert with a whole new, deep respect for her as a performer, as a vocalist (gurl can sang!) and as a person. She's the real deal! Here were some of my favorite songs from the concert:

Katy Perry – By The Grace Of God

Katy Perry – Unconditionally

Katy Perry – Roar

Katy Perry – Dark Horse

Katy Perry – Wide Awake

Katy Perry – Firework

Katy Perry sang "Roar" right to me....I can die happy now.

4th of July

The holiday really starts the night before when we are preparing the boat and our costumes for the boat parade the next morning. This is usually always complete with a late night Walmart run where we act completely ridiculous because we're seriously lacking sleep. Unfortunately, this year I missed the Walmart run, BUT I did receive pictures from it, pictures that I promised never to post as long as I live. Sorry about that. Annie, you're welcome! ;) Then, after heading to bed around 2 or 3am, we get up the next morning and head on over the boat parade! We dominate there and grace everyone with our presence, and then head home to do very Minnesota lake type things, like tube, waterski, and swimming in the middle. It's always a blast! Oh, and we also eat. A LOT! I think I gained like 10 pounds the weekend we were home. At night, we always take the boat over to watch fireworks at Arrowwood Resort.

I am so incredibly happy that Mitchell and I were able to make it back home to Minnesota for the 4th of July!

Anyone who knows anything about the Sipe family knows that we make a HUGE deal about the 4th of July-always have, always will. (To see all of the crazy things we do, check out our Sipe Traditions page) From the boat parade in the morning to fireworks at night and everything in between...it’s a fun time! For the first time in 21 years, I wasn’t going to be able to be a part of the 4th of July festivities. Not gonna lie….that was hard! I didn’t like to think about it because it made me so sad. The night class Mitchell and I were in wasn’t going to allow me to make it home in time because our final exam was at 6pm on July 3rd. I was crushed not only that I wasn’t going to be able to be there, but that Mitchell wouldn’t get to experience the 4th of July the way I did for 21 years. We needed to be there. End of story. To make a very long and emotionally exhausting story short (it included some tears on my part), we were able to take our final and catch a late night flight into Minneapolis. Daddy was waiting to pick us up from the airport and we got back to Alexandria around 2am. Everyone was so surprised to see us! I’m so happy we were able to be there and that Mitchell was able to experience the LOVE BOAT!
That weekend was so nice to be able to spend time with family and hang out on the lake….Minnesota style-something that was completely foreign to Mitchell. It was so cute to see his face the first time we went tubing! He had a blast! It was a great holiday weekend at home that I’m glad we were able to be a part of. YAY AMERICA!!

We won this year!

Lots of laughter on the Love Boat. 

Ice cream scoopers....most important job!

Serving up love one scoop at a time! 

Family bike ride!

Family stroll in the park!

Fireworks!

A weekend full of yard game competitions. :) 

Mitchell tubing!

I just love Carmen and Matthew's face!

Mitchell and his fancy tube jumping trick!

Wahoooo look! No hands!!!

Carmen and Matthew. 

I love my mama!

What I hadn't realized until I saw her again over the 4th was how much I had missed my mama. She knew better than anyone (besides Mitchell, was who right in the brunt of it with me) how much this summer had taken a toll on me. All a girl really needs sometimes is for her mom to tell her that everything will be okay, that she loves you, and she sees how hard you try to be a good person chasing after God. I'm so happy that my mom sees that in me and understands my heart to the very core. I love you mama!!!!

"You are a kind, loving child of God and anyone that is important in your life knows that. Your passion for life, your love for God and love for your family is truly a blessing to all of us. When anyone else says or does things to make you feel less than that, it’s NOT your issue :) Keeping God and Mitchell at the center of your life is all you truly need….a close follow up to your dad and I…Matthew and Tyler! ;) and the many other special people in your life."

Trip to PA

The week after the 4th, Mitchell and I headed up to PA to surprise Gracie for her birthday! We had been planning this trip for months and we were so excited to see her face when we walked in the house! She had just gotten home from camp and was EXHAUSTED; it took her awhile to even recognize who we were and that we were actually standing in front of her! It was so priceless that smile on her face. I love my little sister Gracie so much. I hope she knows that! She is unlike any other young girl I've ever had the pleasure of knowing, and I mean that in the best way possible! She is so confident in who she is, more confident than I was at her age, and she is so wise (wise beyond her years) and genuine and happy and FUN! She still likes playing Taylor Swift songs with me on full blast and dancing like crazy! But she can also speak about her love for the Lord like she has known Him for 100 years. I have never seen another young girl her age with as big of a heart as Gracie has. Actually, I doubt I have seen another person with as big of a heart as Gracie has. It is unique and it is beautiful. She is a blessing to me and I miss her so much when we're not together. I loved being able to be there on her birthday and I know Mitchell felt the same way.

FroYo with the birthday girl!! YUM!!

And who can forget Faith?! The girl is a hoot!! I feel so much joy when I'm around her. So much joy is found in the little things, like putting her to bed at night and hearing her say her prayers and how she says, "Dear God, thank you for....thank you for....thank you for....." She already has such a grateful heart and its something I can learn from her! There is also joy found in the times when she tries to stick an entire GIANT marshmallow in her mouth!

Prayer Partners for Show Hope

This summer, Mitchell and I started another advocacy project for Show Hope. One in which we bought bracelets to sell that say, "Hope" on them. All proceeds from sales will be donated to Show Hope. When you purchase a bracelet, we enroll you in Show Hope's monthly prayer focus updates! Each month you'll receive a new child to pray for as well as other Show Hope initiatives under prayer. We have already seen a community of Prayer Partners begin! If you're interested in learning more, check out my Show Hope Advocacy page. 

August Trip Home

In a few short days, Mitchell and I are headed home for 2 weeks of much needed family time. Actually, it's one of our big trips home to wedding plan! We have a whole huge list of stuff we need to accomplish. I'll be updating our website and our wedding blog with all of the updates! Be sure to check that out! Before we head home, we're going to meet up with our best friend Jared, who has been interning in Orlando all summer! We've missed that crazy kid so much! 

Water Park Adventures!

Today Mitchell took me to Nashville Shores! This AMAZING water park on the lake here in Nashville. It was so fun! I told Mitchell, "our lives have gotten really really heavy lately! We needed something to make us feel like kids again." This day was perfect. It really was and we had SO much fun!

Water park on the lake.....best of both worlds!

I must go now because my baby is picking me up soon for date night! He said "We're going to a restaurant, bar, and the movie theatre all without leaving your apartment!" So....I guess that means date night in tonight. It really sounds perfect! :) 

Thanks for checking in! Until next time, 

Keep Calm and Listen to Music!

-Emily

Hillsong Worship – None But Jesus
Hillsong United – Hosanna
Hillsong Worship – From The Inside Out
Hillsong Worship – At The Cross
Hillsong Worship – Mighty To Save
Elevation Worship – Only King Forever
Elevation Worship – Give Me Faith
Phil Wickham – This Is Amazing Grace
Hillsong United – Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)
Hillsong United – Like an Avalanche

A Changing Heart

Hi friends,

Blog Renamed! 

Thank you for coming back to read more about what God's been doing in my life. The first change you may notice....my blog has a new name! That's right. I felt it was time to change things up a bit. For one thing, most of my blog posts have been more and more about Hope (adoption, Show Hope) and less and less about music. I figured the name change was appropriate. Don't get me wrong now. Music....I'm still in love with it. I will be posting music that I love and inserting songs all over the place so for all you music readers out there, not to worry. I just wanted my blog title to be about more than just that one passion of mine. Instead, I wanted my blog title to convey my heart's greatest desire in life. That is, to show hope to anyone and everyone who needs it. My prayer is that through this blog, you will find your own piece of hope. :)

Time at Home

I believe my last post left off the night my younger brother Matthew went to prom. I still can't believe that 1.) he's old enough to be going to prom and 2.) He was actually talked into going to prom. Despite my disbeliefs, he indeed went, and I have pictures to prove it.

Oh yeah, my sister Carmen went to prom too. She looked absolutely beautiful, and it wasn't just because she's wearing my dress. ;) 

While I was at home, my mom and I went to work on wedding plans. Flowers, dresses, food, you name it....we planned it. I officially own my wedding dress but obviously I will not be posting pictures of that because Mitchell reads my blog regularly. (At least, he says he does.) Just to be safe, I'll wait until after the wedding to post any pictures of it. For those of you wanting details, yes, it did make my mother and I cry, and yes it is pretty. No, it's not pink. :)

Mother's Day

I'm so happy that I was able to be home for Mother's Day. This picture includes some of the best mothers I have ever known. I'm so blessed to have such incredible role-models and I love them all so very much.

My Grandma Marilyn, Godmother Kathy, Great Grandma Margaret Hanson (whom I'm named after!) and my mother, Jana. Oh yeah, and the little adorably cute baby is me! :) 

The Band Perry – Mother Like Mine

In addition to celebrating some of the best women in my life, my cousin Micayla is getting married in TWO WEEKS, so we had a bridal shower for her. I am so happy that I was able to share in such a special day for Cayla. She really deserves all the happiness in the world. I was also able to spend some time with my bridesmaids which is always a blessing! Unfortunately, due to some health complications, my Grandma Sipe wasn't able to attend the shower. Thank goodness for technology; we included her via FaceTime!

Some of my lovely bridesmaids! Annie, Madisen, and Katie.

I'm so happy these two are my maids of honor! Sisters at heart from the start!

Time at home always seems to fly by way too fast. I'm grateful for the time I was able to spend with my family; I was genuinely sad to leave them. After two weeks of being home, I was off to Pennsylvania to see my honey and spend some time with the Steeles! I was so excited to see them again and to spend some time in North Carolina!

Family Vacation

Okay, those of you who know me know that I'm pretty much one of the biggest book worms on the planet. If you didn't know that about me, well then SURPRISE! Now you do. I'm so happy that I have a mother who introduced me to Nicholas Sparks romance novels at a young age. All of his novels are set in North Carolina and it has been my life dream ever since I started reading them to go there. When Mitchell invited me to go along with his family to the Outer Banks, I was literally elated!! 

Our house was named Pineapple Place! 

#selfie 

There are so many things I could write about this family vacation. It was an opportunity to grow together, and that I believe we did. I feel like I walked away with a better understanding of every family member. With more understanding, comes an ability to love on a much, much deeper level. My prayer is that I'm able to grow more and more as a member of this family, and learn to love them more and more each day. 

You see the love this family has? Yeah, its real. Here are some pictures from our Beach Photo Shoot! :)

Oh Kelli. This girl and I have already been through so much as sisters. 

What I've gained from it all is an understanding and genuine love for her. 

Gracie, you are the best. 

I love this whole having sisters thing! 

This is us in a nutshell. 

And this one too. 

Friday has become sort of like our "date day"and so on the Friday of vacation, Mitchell took me on a date to a beach where he and I just got to spend the whole day together. It was wonderful. :) That day just happened to be the 23rd of May, the 365 day mark. 365 days until our wedding. As we were sitting there on the beach, we looked over to the left and saw a wedding happening right there before our eyes. It made me cry just watching this wedding happen because all I could think about was the fact that that was going to be us in ONE YEAR! It was a beautiful moment for us and I'm so happy we had the chance to see that. Whoever the happy couple was, I'm so honored we were invited to witness their wedding. ;) 

On our way home from the beach, we took a side trip to Washington D.C. I'm SO happy they know me so well and knew that I have this crazy (borderline weird) amount of love for our nation's capital. I was in heaven!! 

World War II Memorial. Yes, they let you stand in it!! How cool is that?! 

The Washington Memorial 

The Lincoln Memorial

Oh sweet vacation. You were over too soon. Now, Mitchell and I are back in Nashville and trying to figure out how to cope with this new crazy schedule of ours. All good things....it's just a lot, especially for two kids who have always loved summer vacation. :) We both have 4 classes we are taking this summer. The 1 on campus is our Music Publishing class. 3 are online. In addition to class, both of us are interning full-time. Mitchell is still at RareSpark Media Group and he is rocking it! I started my new internship at Show Hope! Speaking of....let me fill you in on my first week as a Show Hope intern. 

Show Hope

I was welcomed with open arms. When you walk in the doors of Show Hope, you can feel this incredible peace and love in the air. Everyone there is friendly and welcoming. Everyone there is like this bright light shining. From the first minute I spent there, I felt so blessed to be a part of the family. I believe so much in the work they do and it feels like a dream come true that its now part of the work I get to do every day. God is good!! 

I didn't waste any time decorating my desk. :)

Sitting at my new desk in my new cubicle  is my Family figurine. It was given to me by my mother as a reminder that the most important thing is family. Boy, was she right in giving me this. 

My new internship at Show Hope started on Monday. I cannot even begin to explain how much it is blessing my heart being here every day. This is a place where I'm reminded every single second how important family is, and also how important it is to care for those who don't know the love of a forever family. Each person here shares the same heart for orphans and family. It's an unbelievable thing to be a part of. I knew I needed a job that I could go to every day and not only feel like I'm making a difference but actually be able to see it in a tangible way. God is answering this prayer through my work at Show Hope. I'm able to connect with people who have been touched by adoption through grants and care centers. I'm touched every day by the number of sponsors and advocates moved to do something to restore hope to orphans. Their heart and passion to help is so encouraging! Lives are being changed....and I get to be a part of it! 

Just the other day I was sorting through scrapbooks that were made for children staying at Maria's Big House of Hope (a care center/hospital in China). Their nannies and care givers documented every part of their life in this scrapbook to later give to the family that adopts them. We received a whole box full of scrapbooks, craft projects, Christmas ornaments, and old medical records. As I sat there sorting through everything, tears pricked my eyes and I saw the pictures and read these stories of these children's lives. All of them have been through so much and have come so far, and they now know the love of a forever family. It warms my heart and makes me so thankful for organizations like Show Hope that make that possible. 

I've only been here a week and already I'm learning so much! About adoption, grants, care centers, politics, history, culture, child protection laws....you name it. I have told Mitchell multiple times that this information will serve us well later in life when we start down the path of bringing our daughter, Hope home from China. I'm surrounded by a community of people who are familiar with adoption, and who have also adopted their own children. I cannot even tell you how comforting that is to me to know that they are here to walk with us through the process. God without a doubt placed me here to give me the comfort He knew I needed and will need down the road. He is faithful! This internship is blessing me. I wish I could stay here forever....

Hope

Hope. I see her name everywhere. Literally. Every single day I see her name on everything I touch. I think about her every day. Ever single day I think about her and how I just want so badly to have her as my own. I want so badly to be her mama. I want so badly to save her from anything bad that might happen to her before Mitchell and I get to her. She is in my thoughts all of the time now. Every scrapbook I went through, I wondered if she will have her own when we get her. Every testimony I read, I think about how we will get to write ours when we finally bring her home. I can't wait until our family can be used to share a message of hope to others wanting to adopt. 

Isn't it crazy to think that I love somebody this much whom I've never met and very well may not even be born yet? No, my daughter may not even be alive yet but she is a thought in God's mind, and a though in mine. I can't fully explain how it's possible for me to love her right now but I do. Based on how much both Mitchell and I already love her, I'm willing to bet that she is going to be the most loved little girl on the planet! Mitchell and I will write notes to her and when she is old enough to understand how God gave her to us, we will share with her that journal. It's so important for her to know that we longed for, desired her, and prayed for her long before we started the adoption process. I end every single post by saying, "Hope Susann, we are crazy about you and can't wait to be your mama and daddy! You'll be home soon." 

Facing Giants 

Our paster Pete from Cross Point spoke a message on facing giants. Let me give you some context on that. It was part of a message series on having these God-given dreams placed on your heart. He gave 4 typical phases of a dream: become aware, face opposition, endure difficulties, learn surrender. The first week was all about becoming aware of this God given dream. It was about listening to God and obeying when he places these things on your heart. For me, it was realizing that God's plans are better than mine. I've seen the beautiful things in my own life that God can do with a life once it is given over to Him. The first step is simply becoming aware of what God wants to do in and with your life. For me, I believe wholeheartedly that God wants me to be a part of the movement to care for orphans through my work at Show Hope, and through our own adoption journey. 

The next week, was all about facing giants. Based on the story of David and Goliath, its important for us to also acknowledge that BIG DREAMS have BIG FIGHTS. Giants can come in many forms. Whether it's a lack of resources (money, education), an opposing group (friends family), intimidating circumstances (health and other), or internal giants (fear, self doubt, discouragement).  The fact of the matter is when God gives you a big dream, the world is going to come at you with all kinds of giants. When you're willing to step out in Faith to do something big for God's kingdom, the enemy himself is going to throw every type of roadblock in your way to discourage you from going through with it. Just take my life as an example. When I first had this feeling that God was leading me towards a different life than the one I had planned for myself, I faced (and am still facing) all kinds of giants. I was afraid of what my family would say. I was afraid of how Mitchell and I would afford to adopt. I was afraid that I wasn't qualified. I faced all kinds of difficulties on my way to work at Show Hope, but it was because I knew God wanted me there that I was able to press on. See, our giants are never going to go away on their own. You can either let them stop you, or let God fight them on your behalf. I had to make a decision with my life right then and there when all these giants were punching me in the face. Was I going to have a giant focus or a God focus? Was I going to cry to God about how big my problems are or am I going to tell my problems how big my God is? I chose to adopt what Pete called a God-focus, and it has been a freeing experience for me. I'm able to live out these God-given dreams without the fear of the giants in my way. 

It is no secret that God has done a HUGE changing of my heart. It was a complete life changer for me. Suddenly, what I came here to go to school for didn't seem to matter as much. Making a name for myself in the Music Industry lost its appeal, and I began reading about how I could prepare myself for our adoption, homeschool curriculums, and how to be a good help mate for Mitchell. My life has become about so much more than the name I can make for myself in Nashville, or the type of industry job I can land. I realized that God is way more concerned with the kind of wife and mother I become than the job I have. My entire focus has completely shifted to something completely different, and I feel like I'm able to see God way more clearly than I ever have before. It's been amazing, but I would be lying if I said it didn't scare me sometimes. What scares me is not the unknown; I know God has got my back. What scares me sometimes is the fact that I'm SO okay with it. God decided to do these things in my heart and I didn't even have to think twice about obeying. When did I become that kind of person who follows first and asks questions later? When did I become the type of girl who steps out in faith without letting her giants hold her back a little bit first? That's the power of our God. He is able to change us without us even being aware of it happening at the time. One day, we just look back on our lives and we are left standing in awe of the beautiful work He's done. 

My biggest giant by far was dealing with the fact that God has a plan for my life, but so does everybody else. When their plan doesn't line up with God's, their natural tendency is to question it, or try and hold me back simply because they don't understand. They don't do it intending to be malicious. Often times they may not even realize they're doing it. It's that classic notion that what we don't understand scares us. There are many people in my life who simply do not understand what God is doing with my life. They don't understand why I went to Belmont to study Music Business when God isn't even calling me to work in the Music Industry anymore. They don't understand why I would pay thousands of dollars to go to an expensive school, only to decide that I want to stay at home and raise my kids full-time when there is such a thing as daycare.  They don't understand why I would want to homeschool my kids when there are plenty of good schools I could send them to. They don't understand our call to adopt. They simply don't understand that it's not me deciding to do all these things. The only decision I made was to let God start guiding my life, and this is the story He is writing. The thing is, while I know that these giants exist in my life, I have not wavered in what God has called me to do. I'm still going to stay at home full-time and raise my kids. I'm still going to homeschool. Mitchell and I are still going to adopt. What God calls us to He will equip us for. I have to trust Him. No questions asked. 

Francesca Battistelli – Giants Fall

Enduring Delays

I am not the most patient woman in the world. Mitchell is laughing out loud right now because he knows it is true. God is teaching me and I'm working at it, but it's dang hard. Another phase of a God-given dream is to endure delays. That's right where I am. I believe God is taking care of my giants so I can learn how to learn patience during this delay He has us in. 

Delay #1: Our wedding is in 348 days, and while people tell me the time will fly, it feels like a long ways out. I'm just so ready to be married, but I'm just trusting that God has more to do with us in these days before. 

Delay #2: He's called me to be a stay at home mom. Great! I don't have any kids yet. Thus, a delay. I'm just focusing on having patience in the meantime and being open to what He wants me to do in the midst of this delay.

Delay #3: He's called us to homeschool. Again, awesome! But if we don't have any kids to homeschool, we're in the delay stage of this dream too. 

Delay #4: The biggest dream and delay of all. The call to adopt. For one thing, to adopt from China, Mitchell and I have to both be 30 years old before we can even start the process. Then, the wait period can be as long as 10 years! So, if you're any good at math, that's around 20 years that God could be delaying this dream for us. Talk about a test of patience! 

What keeps me from going literally insane during delays is knowing that there must be a good reason for them. If these things aren't happening in my life right now, then there must be more He needs to do in my heart before they can happen. It's an incredible test of trust to remain faithful during delays, but then I remember that  God's timing is best. 

Francesca Battistelli – Time In Between

Thoughts on Adoption

I was talking to my friend, Katie one night about adopting and how we feel so strongly that God wants us to do it. She brought up an interesting point. So many people I think, view adoption as a last resort. You know, they think adoption is only for people who can't have kids of their own. While adoption is a beautiful blessing for those individuals, it isn't the only reason God calls people to adopt. James 1:27 very clearly states that we are ALL called to care for the orphans and widows. While we may not all be called to adopt, we all can do something. 

I read an incredible blog post a few weeks back. Show Hope has a guest blogger, Stefanie and she wrote a beautiful piece, Why Does God Call People to Adopt?? It was killer and I will be saving it forever. Please, check it out and follow more of Stefanie's posts at: nihaoyall.com

I really would encourage you to read her whole post; it really is wonderful. There were a couple things about it that stood out to me and hit my heart hard. It's like she knew exactly what God was doing in my heart and then wrote about it. There is so much comfort found in the fact that I'm not the first person God has decided to call through this. 

"When we adopt, it's God's idea. It is God that's going in- and He asks us to join Him. And God wants to use all things to draw us closer to Him, not elevate ourselves. The beautiful thing about being God's assistant in this thing called adoption is that you get to join in His work, get your hands dirty, see the way the Lord transforms and yet He holds up both ends."

The first sentence even made me stop and just stare. There are people out there I'm willing to bet that think this whole adoption thing is just something people wake up one day and decide to do. Or, they think it's just a fad or the "cool Christian" thing to do. Not so. It is a HIGH, HIGH calling. It's a calling that you can try and bury somewhere deep in your own heart but once He lays it there, you cannot hide from it, you cannot erase it. You have no choice but to obey it. Is it scary? Yes. But I can tell you that I've never once doubted it. Despite others in my life who have and who have even tried to talk me out of it, I have not doubted that this is the journey God is asking Mitchell and I to join Him on. God is already preparing my heart for the biggest journey of my life, and He's starting now through my work at Show Hope. When I stop and really think about this call to adopt, I think how God is using me to rescue and save the life of one of His beloved children. I don't see that as a burden or a heavy task that can be checked off the list to earn me gold stars in heaven. No. This call to adopt is an honor. Being Hope's mama is going to be one of the greatest honors of my life, and I can't wait!  

"So if you are called to adopt, count yourself greatly blessed. As bearers of the Good News, called to adoption, we get to participate in His magnificent plan to redeem what this broken world has trampled on. What a merciful and loving God we serve. And if the journey gets difficult- and it will- just remember, it's His thing, this orphan care movement. And He will finish what He has started. Because these children are His beloved." 

I do count us greatly blessed that God chose us as His beloved people to care for one of His beloved children. It is by God's goodness and grace alone that Mitchell and I get to raise Hope to love and know Jesus, and to love her to the best of our ability. This whole orphan movement is God's thing. He has instilled in so many people a heart for the fatherless and it is absolutely amazing to be a part of it. Still, it can feel hopeless at times. There are so many children in the world without loving families and the barriers to adoption can be high. I find comfort in the fact that God is the one who started this movement to care for orphans. It wasn't a man made thing. No. God MOVED and WORKED in the hearts of his people to care for the fatherless. He BEGAN this good work in us, and HE will finish what He started. He promises us that. 

Steven Curtis Chapman – Finish What He Started

"And when we obey the call and join Him in His story we realize THIS is what we were made for. We were made for so much more than serving ourselves and pursuing our dreams. Instead, He comes down, changes our hearts and changes our dreams. And His plan is so.much.better." 

I swear, this post could have come straight from my mouth. My life has changed so drastically that I don't even know if I'd recognize the me I was a year or two ago. God has moved in amazing ways and has chosen to work through me in amazing ways. The way my life is now is nothing like I planned. I would not have been able to guess that this is where I would be if you would've asked me. My plans would've put me on an entirely different path. My life is a testament to the fact that God's plans our way better than my own. I reached a point where I was ready to follow HIS plan. My dreams no longer mattered. He came down and changed my heart in such a way that I no longer hold on tight to any of my plans but I'm open to whatever He has in store for me. If you're looking for a way to rid yourself of some stress and pressure, give your future over to God. I can't even tell you how good it feels to know that my entire life....my marriage, my family, my Hope, my eternity are all in HIS hands now. 

June Prayer Focus

Please join with us in praying for Jaspher, Show Hope's June Prayer Focus.

I feel so blessed that I'm able to share my life with you here. Thank you for taking the time to check in! Until next time, Keep Calm and Listen to Music!

Showing Hope,

Emily